So I went to Japan…..
This is Sam. Sam currently has a mortgage and foolishly decided to buy a ticket to go Japan for two weeks. Sam doesn’t earn much money, he works 45 hours a week but it simply won’t be enough to fund his journey to the land of the rising sun. Continue reading
Awkward times. Upon reflection they make for amusing anecdotes, tales to share with friends and what not. They make you think back through your life and think ,”Fuck, I’m such a loser..also I sound American by using the term ‘Loser’ oh well”.
Gather round as I list off three awkward moments from my life that I’ve had the unfortunate pleasure of experiencing.
Right, tomorrow be Valentine’s Day, based on all the “OMG who needs someone on Valentine’s Day” or “I don’t need anyone for Valentine’s Day” posts and stuff. Anyway I got bills to pay and so I’m offering up my services for tomorrow to anyone who would like to exchange cash for said service.
So a while back a friend of mine who I haven’t seen in a while asked if I wanted to attend an Asian Padlock event with her. At first I wasn’t sure how I felt about attending an event which sounded like some sort of Asian slave audition extravaganza. However it turned out it was a sort of dating meet up thingy that included the word “Valentine’s” even though it took place on the 9th of Feb and not 14th. Buzzing on the fact that this event would take place during my week off work and 2 days after my Birthday I agreed…
#Go Sammy it’s your birthday, we gon party like it’s your birthday…..#
That was of course a slightly edited version of the 50 Cent classic, In Da Club.
So a few posts ago, I did 50 facts about myself and I thought I’d milk that particular idea and do another to celebrate my Birthday, only problem is that my life isn’t exciting enough to warrant another 50 facts. So I’d thought I’d get you lot to do some work and ask me a bunch of questions that I’m going to answer like some sort of weird guy whose being questioned.
Yay, another blog post, and you thought Christmas only came once a year, well clearly you don’t know about that prostitute called “Christmas”.
I get pretty awesome feedback about my blog from my friends and people of the Internets and over time it’s slowly aroused my ego like an old person getting an erection during a marathon 4 hour lap dance. I do enjoy writing this blog but sometimes it would be nice to take a break and well, let someone else take over for once. And that’s exactly what’s going to happen in this post.
You see my ego is so inflated that I feel that this blog can actually warrant a guest writer and so that’s what I’ve done. I’ve chosen someone whose work I’d love to read more of, however they don’t have their own blog so I asked them to write on mine! Unfortunately they wished to remain anonymous for certain reasons….well read on. As I can’t refer you to them to heap the amazing amount of praise they deserve for this hilarious post, you’ll just have let them know via the comments section! DO IT!
Without further ado….
Remember back when I hit my 10,000th Tweet and I made a blog post about it to celebrate the occasion? Why am I even asking I know you don’t, so click here to remind yourselves. Done? Finished cleaning up from wetting yourselves from laughter? You better drink some water to rehydrated after crying tears of joy and stuff. Done? Excellent, let’s continue.