So the other day I went to see Watchmen, or as I have now dubbed it:

13watchmen

It was a decent flick for action and boobs but there wasn’t enough of it to hold my attention. Also I really couldn’t take some of the costumes seriously….yes I know this is a movie based on a comic book but, you didn’t see Wolverine running around in a yellow skin tight S&M number calling everyone “Bub” in the live action movies did you?

Also, why do characters from comics with a “dark” theme seem to suffer from the after effects of deep throating a cactus?

power

To be honest though most of those characters are pretty badarse and there was no exception for one of the characters in Watchmen namely, Rorschach. He’s the one who looks like his wearing a shit filled nappy over his face and the contents are constantly moving around and can be seen from the outside, which may also explain his gruff voice.

Another standout character from the movie was The Comedian, who just kept reminding me of Robert Downey, Jr mainly because he looked so much like him! He came out with the funny remarks but unless Robert Downey, Jr likes to attempt to rape other Superheroes, or shoots pregnant women dead or generally be “That Guy”, I think that’s where the similarities ends.

Oh and how can we forget about Dr Manhattan or as I call him Dr Man-no-hatt-on. It seems that when his out in Vietnam, literally making people explode just by waving at them, his happy to wear some underwear, however when his at home working on a super energy bomb thingy device, his happy enough to just let shit hang. That’s right, this movie contained a lot of blue cock, and I don’t mean he was gagging for a quick fiddle with someone, he of course is completely blue, cock and all! Now a few things kinda had me thinking whilst watching this movie.

1. When you’re working on a super energy reactor thing, do you really wanna have your cock swinging about the place two and throw? What if it gets caught in something?

2. With the ability to grow in size at will, surely he must of been able to keep his misses happy, and yet he couldn’t! Especially when he attempts to gang bang her by making numerous clones of himself.

3. Dunno about you, but if I was fighting in a war and saw a 50 ft naked blue man with his cock out, I’d be inclined to pretty much just give up and accept defeat. No need to get blown up and what not.

4. I’ve thought way too much about a comic book character and his blue cock.

willy

Maybe my attention span is that of a goldfish who watches too much tv and spends too much time online, and I just couldn’t grasp wtf was going on, till the end. Maybe there were too many characters with different stories and shit. I mean it wasn’t a completely shit movie. The action was good and some of the characters were pretty fucking sweet. However I don’t know of I can be arsed to sit through 3 hours of it again. I honestly felt like I was about to sleep whilst watching it. Although that could be because of my shitty sleep pattern!

Till next time! Peace!

Here’s how to get one stop closer to a heart attack, sweet popcorn with a special ingredient……………M&M’s!

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